Speak life over and be an encouragement to the little humans around you.
I hate when I make mistakes. It’s in my brain that mistakes are bad, and if I make one, I’m bad. My childhood wasn't full of a lot of praise or validation when I did well. But I literally cried when I got a C or something one time in college. Yes, I was that* person.
I would do something and say to myself, “Wow, I’m dumb for that.”
That’s not helpful. That’s not something I’d want said to my niece. That’s not a message I want her to receive. I've talked about the Enneagram before. I spent two years learning about it and wrote about 4 Low Risk Ways for 5s to Explore Their Creativity. I think my niece is an 8 - the Challenger. She charges ahead and does impulsive things. She makes a lot of mistakes, and she's learning. She might have a few executive functioning issues which might be ADHD. I'm realizing I might too.
I don’t ever want her to feel like she’s dumb or bad for her mistakes.
So I’m re-learning, again, how to talk to myself. Because over the past few months, I’ve noticed this child is watching me. Modeling me. Talking like me.
She wants to write books like me (which expect a couple of children’s books by whatever pen name she chooses. Might be Sparkle Unicorn Princess. We have a few book ideas we’re working on).
So I have to model behavior that will be empowering to her. I have the opportunity to do so.
I get to help shape a little girl into a young woman who I can already see has the potential to be a leader. And she is going to be a leader. While she's with me, I feel a responsibility to show her that. I read one book by Brene Brown, my first one, and wept continuously reading it. I'm not sure it was supposed to, but it did.
In the book, she talked about vulnerability and leadership in business. I don't lead a team currently, but I coach and have clients so I apply some of that there. But I saw many tools that would help in a family. You can buy the book here through my affiliate link. As of today, you can earn Kindle points that you can use to buy more books -- finally! I hope you find something in the book that helps you to have a better relationship with the people around you and yourself.
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